Find a Good Fit in Therapy
Making the decision to see a therapist takes a lot of guts. First, you have to be aware that there is something in your life that you would like to change (don’t people say admitting you have a problem is the first step?). But then after that, you have to wade through all of your preconceived judgments about therapy. Especially in communities of color, we have often been taught that seeking therapy means that you are weak, or that you should keep your problems within the family.
You moved past all of that (or most of it) and made the courageous decision to work toward a better you! In the case of therapy, that means sharing very personal things with another person, usually a complete stranger.
It can be nerve-racking to start this journey toward growth with someone you do not know. One thing that makes it easier to talk about vulnerable things is consultation. Consultations are about 15-20 minutes and can be held on the phone, online or in person. Therapists often offer consultations as a way to connect and see if it makes sense to continue working together. One of the greatest determinants of positive results in therapy is the relationship you build with your therapist, and one size does NOT fit all.
The consultation is your first opportunity to get an idea of if there is a good fit. Again, the appointment is only about 15 minutes. So this is just an initial gut check. If initially you decide to work with this therapist, you will have many more opportunities in the future to gauge the fit.
The other purpose of a consultation is to see whether or not a therapist can meet your needs effectively. If you experience anxiety and your therapist has a specialization in depression, you might not get what you need from that person. If this therapist has absolutely no experience personally or professionally with people of color and you are that person of color...it might not be the best fit.
Consultations are about 15-20 minutes long. So if you want to make the best use of your time, I would suggest asking yourself some questions first.
Do I want therapy to be a space where I lead the conversation or do I want my therapist to take the lead?
How much money can I invest in therapy?
What are my hopes and fears for therapy?
Are there certain identities (gender, race/ethnicity, age, etc.) I had in mind when considering a therapist?
Once you have an idea of what you are looking for in a therapist, here are a few questions that might help you get to know them and how they work a bit more.
Why did you decide to become a therapist?
What is your counseling philosophy/theoretical orientation?
How does a typical session work with you?
Who and what informs your understanding of oppression?
Is there a typical length of time I should meet with you?
After the consultation, if you liked what you heard, schedule your appointment and pat yourself on the back! You are making the decision to invest in YOURSELF and you should be proud of that!
